Kate, my sister passed in October while in hospice. She suffered with extreme MS disability for some years. She was in a hospice care center. I went out to give my nieces a short break and stayed in her room. She unexpectedly passed the next morning while I was there. To be of service to her and them in her passing was a humbling and deeply connecting experience. Reading this was very touching. I send my love and hope that she has a peaceful passing that brings the same comfort to your partner and the whole family ❤️
Kate-- my heart is heavy, and also full of joy for you and Lauren and Ali-- and Darlene.  To be able to die at home with family, what a gift.
Christy and I just went through this in November-- we had moved her mom in with us in the fall, and she was going to live with us for-- well--forever. Then the next month she was diagnosed with ALS and the next month she passed away in our family room, unable to speak or move and surrounded with love.
We only had hospice for a few days, but like you said, it is the most incredible service and an honor to witness. The most helpful thing that our hospice counselor told us was that her death was already written--it was her own story. However and whenever it happened, was How it was supposed to happen. Christy and I didn’t have to *do anything* --just take care of ourselves and each other and her mom as best we could. This shifted something in my brain where I let go of the idea of what a perfect death had to look like. Before I envisioned no pain all of us standing around, watching her take her last breath. It didn’t go like that. But how it did go was absolutely perfect. Letting go of that enabled me to be present for my wife and myself and our children.
Watching Lauren and her sister go through this must be so difficult for you, but I can also see those moments of laughter like you eating the loud chips. Your levity and crunching and humor and tenderness are a gift to them. I’m thinking about you all. Please send my sincere sympathy to Lauren and her sister, and continue to be gentle with yourselves. Thank you, as always, for sharing your experience with such honestly. --Julia
Kate, my sister passed in October while in hospice. She suffered with extreme MS disability for some years. She was in a hospice care center. I went out to give my nieces a short break and stayed in her room. She unexpectedly passed the next morning while I was there. To be of service to her and them in her passing was a humbling and deeply connecting experience. Reading this was very touching. I send my love and hope that she has a peaceful passing that brings the same comfort to your partner and the whole family ❤️
❤️
Kate-- my heart is heavy, and also full of joy for you and Lauren and Ali-- and Darlene.  To be able to die at home with family, what a gift.
Christy and I just went through this in November-- we had moved her mom in with us in the fall, and she was going to live with us for-- well--forever. Then the next month she was diagnosed with ALS and the next month she passed away in our family room, unable to speak or move and surrounded with love.
We only had hospice for a few days, but like you said, it is the most incredible service and an honor to witness. The most helpful thing that our hospice counselor told us was that her death was already written--it was her own story. However and whenever it happened, was How it was supposed to happen. Christy and I didn’t have to *do anything* --just take care of ourselves and each other and her mom as best we could. This shifted something in my brain where I let go of the idea of what a perfect death had to look like. Before I envisioned no pain all of us standing around, watching her take her last breath. It didn’t go like that. But how it did go was absolutely perfect. Letting go of that enabled me to be present for my wife and myself and our children.
Watching Lauren and her sister go through this must be so difficult for you, but I can also see those moments of laughter like you eating the loud chips. Your levity and crunching and humor and tenderness are a gift to them. I’m thinking about you all. Please send my sincere sympathy to Lauren and her sister, and continue to be gentle with yourselves. Thank you, as always, for sharing your experience with such honestly. --Julia
This is so beautiful.
My only advice is to feel everything. And to keep loving each other. And to remember to eat, even when the crunch is loud.
I’m so glad you all have each other and I love you both very much.